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[0:00] Jesse McAnally: Hello, I'm Jesse McAnally.

[0:02] Andrew DeWolf: And I'm Andrew DeWolf.

[0:04] Jesse McAnally: And welcome to Musicals with Cheese, a podcast where I try to get Andrew to like musical theater. And today we have an extra special guest overtaking, I want to say, the third co-host of this show from Brent Black. It is our friend and yours, Big Beak of Big Beak Entertainment.

[0:26] Big Beak: I don't know what you're talking about, Jess. This is only my fourth time on this show.

[0:30] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, he didn't show up last week. Don't think about that.

[0:33] Jesse McAnally: I mean, if we had to count, because you are a relatively new one, but we just keep asking you back. How many times has it been now?

[0:42] Big Beak: Counting or not counting the cheese wheel?

[0:44] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, counting cheese wheel. That's the same show.

[0:46] Andrew DeWolf: I thought you were doing a bit for a second.

[0:48] Jesse McAnally: No.

[0:49] Big Beak: And then he just explodes with good out of his neck.

[0:57] Andrew DeWolf: It would be so funny if I lost power at that exact moment.

[1:03] Jesse McAnally: Because your first one was. This would be like number eight, I think.

[1:07] Big Beak: God, we're pushing 10. You're pushing a 10 timer.

[1:10] Jesse McAnally: Yeah. Anybody else got 10 times? I think someone else. I think Brent definitely has 10. Sideways also. Brendan Sideways, I'm pretty sure, have put on that many times. But we do just keep inviting you on.

[1:25] Big Beak: It's because you know that I have no life and I have nothing better to do than watch absolute garbage like the Angry Video Game Nerd movie.

[1:34] Andrew DeWolf: I'm excited today to talk about Polynesian architecture, finally.

[1:39] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, let's talk about it. And do you want to talk about the video game crash?

[1:41] Big Beak: Yeah. You know what? Fuck it. You know what? This episode is about the 1983 video game crash. I'm hijacking it. This week, in case you haven't picked up on our subtle hints, we are talking about Disney's Moana 2.

[2:12] ♪ Musical number ♪

[3:28] Jesse McAnally: So Moana 2 is a film written by Jared Bush and Dana Ladue Miller, and with music and lyrics by Abigail Barlow and Emily Baer, Rip survived the Netflix lawsuit. Based on Moana from 2016, the film opened in the United States on November 27, 2024, and became the 44th highest grossing film of all time. Moana 2 grossed $460.4 million at the United States and Canada box office, and $598.8 million in other territories, for a total box office total of $1.059 billion worldwide.

[4:12] Andrew DeWolf: It's great. Did you know Spider-Man made that amount last week?

[4:16] Jesse McAnally: On the review aggregator website Rotten Tomatoes, 61% of 245 critics' reviews are positive, with an average rating of 6 out of 10. Its consensus reads, "Riding high on a wave of stunning animation, even when its story runs adrift, I disagree. Moana isn't as inspired as the original, but still delights as a colorful adventure." The plot of Moana 2 is set three years after the events of the first film. Moana 2 follows Moana as she receives an unexpected call from her wayfinding ancestors.

[4:57] Big Beak: That is the first thing you have to mention. This is a fucking TV show.

[5:00] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah. So, as a component of launching their new streaming service, Disney+, Disney greenlit a lot of innovative, you know, new-

[5:06] Jesse McAnally: Dumpster fire.

[5:11] Andrew DeWolf: They greenlit a lot of new, innovative, excellent, high-quality streaming television. Such wonderful shows as The Book of Boba Fett, and also Moana, the series. And this was, I guess, three episodes of the series, and then eventually Disney was like, well, we're not going to actually make any money if we just put it on streaming. So, what if we put it into theaters and then put it on streaming? Because that's just the same life cycle, but like, you know, we'll get some theater kickbacks, and we'll make the theater show it a lot by like threatening to withhold, you know, Avengers 7 or whatever. So, it'll always be playing for like a month, and everybody will take their kids to see it, because, you know, everybody just wants their kids to shut up for two hours.

[6:01] Big Beak: I love art.

[6:02] Andrew DeWolf: That's all you could really ask for out of a movie.

[6:04] Jesse McAnally: But in the grander scheme of the why, let's take a look at Disney's 2023. That was one of their worst financial years to date, after coming from such hot successes from, you know, the 2010s, building up to Avengers Endgame. Such flops as Elemental, which eventually made money, but started off really rough. Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny, horrific flop, one of the most expensive films of all time.

[6:31] Big Beak: Great film, absolutely recommend from Big Beak Entertainment.

[6:35] Andrew DeWolf: Dial of Destiny, really?

[6:36] Big Beak: Yeah, for the last scene alone.

[6:39] Jesse McAnally: Does he get eaten by a snake?

[6:40] Big Beak: Eventually, you realize that it's the exact same ethos as the first movie, which is just, let's laugh at Nazis, and then you enjoy it.

[6:49] Andrew DeWolf: Like, aren't these guys so fucking stupid? And then you're like, yeah, I'm on board.

[6:53] Jesse McAnally: I could just turn on the news.

[6:58] Big Beak: I like Phoebe Waller-Bridge. I will recommend anything with her in it.

[7:01] Jesse McAnally: Then you have The Marvels, which is a film I kind of lightly defend, but was such a ridiculous flop that I'm pretty sure Brie Larson can never be in movies again.

[7:11] Andrew DeWolf: That's just what my grandfather calls all Marvel movies.

[7:13] Big Beak: The Marvels.

[7:16] Jesse McAnally: On a budget of $374 million, it made $206 million, like, level flop. Then you have, it all builds up to the 100th year anniversary film, Wish, which we've done a previous episode on.

[7:30] Big Beak: Ooh, classic.

[7:32] Jesse McAnally: That was a horrendous flop, making barely like $5 billion above its budget.

[7:37] Andrew DeWolf: I'm struggling to think of a wisecrack about it, but I can't remember anything about that movie, except that they didn't remember how to animate the star guy.

[7:46] Big Beak: They forgot in the intervening years how to actually animate cell shading.

[7:52] Jesse McAnally: We forgot how to do the main thing our company was founded on.

[7:55] Andrew DeWolf: Oops.

[7:59] Jesse McAnally: We have that year, and basically, Disney's like, oh, fuck, we have nothing for next year, and we are poor stockholders. How will we get them some money?

[8:13] Andrew DeWolf: Just so you know how quick this was, that year ends, and on February 7th, 2024 is when they announce Moana is coming out that same year.

[8:22] Big Beak: I mean, damn, just buy some Disney stock.

[8:26] Jesse McAnally: But the thing is, this shrewd and obvious business decision paid off in dividends.

[8:34] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, I see it's the 44th highest grossing movie of all time.

[8:39] Big Beak: So this is something that I've noticed. I've got one of those movie passes at theaters where you can see one free movie a day, and something that I've noticed is they just don't make movies anymore, like at all.

[8:53] Andrew DeWolf: I don't know.

[8:54] Big Beak: When you're right, you're right.

[8:55] Andrew DeWolf: But this year has been a step up as far as real movies existing.

[9:00] Big Beak: You misunderstand me. When I say they don't make movies anymore, I mean, it's so expensive to make movies that if you put a movie into theaters, it's either going to have the budget of absolutely nothing, or it's got to make 20 more billion dollars. So that creates sort of, you know, there are movies that, genres that are sort of will fit that theme more, you know, the big blockbusters, and then horror indie, you know, which is cheap to make, you know, you can make your budget back. But one of the movies that it's very difficult to make money on now, if you're not making like a big blockbuster, is children's films. They don't really make, you know, Babe 2, Pig in the City anymore. You know, you either make, you've got animation studios making Minions 7, or you're Disney making, you know, whatever Disney's making, Moana 7, or you are trying to make like a family movie, like the Sheep Detectives or something out of an existing like children's book.

[9:58] Jesse McAnally: I gotta say, there is one mighty exception that has been making a lot of money at the box office every time, and that is the Paw Patrol movies, made on dirt cheap budgets and making like 200 million every time they're released.

[10:14] Big Beak: Well, that's kind of my point, right? Like, they just make an hour version of the fucking TV show, which is already like dirt cheap to make.

[10:20] Andrew DeWolf: That's exactly what they do with Moana 2.

[10:22] Big Beak: Yeah, you are, you know, people want to take their kids to the movies. Like, people really do want their kids to see movies, and they want to go see movies with their kids, and they want to drop them off in a theater. Well, they go see, you know, Obsession or Backrooms or whatever they want to see.

[10:37] Jesse McAnally: I Want Your Sex, The Invite.

[10:39] Big Beak: Yeah, whatever their parents want to see, they're going to drop their kids off with grandma at the children's movie, you know. So, those movies, like, there is a market for it, but it just seems like there's not a lot of companies actually making them. So, when a movie comes out that is for children, I think if it's just decent enough, or if it's already, you know, aping off of an existing IP that parents are familiar with, then it's like, okay, yeah, we'll just, we'll see it. You know, it's not even like a enthusiasm. It's just like, it's something to do today.

[11:10] Andrew DeWolf: Yep.

[11:11] Big Beak: Why is making movies so expensive, though? What happened?

[11:14] Jesse McAnally: I don't know. You know, you'd think that everything was just going to be cheap forever, you know, a can of Coke costs like five cents.

[11:22] Andrew DeWolf: In the 70s, you just had a dude running around with a camera, and it's like, we're good to go. You make Rocky.

[11:26] Jesse McAnally: Do we want a real answer? Or do we want just, like, goofs?

[11:30] Andrew DeWolf: Give us a real answer. What do you got?

[11:32] Jesse McAnally: I think it's oversaturation of the market. Basically, anyone with a camera, including myself, can make a quote unquote movie that can get out there and get into a distribution like Tubi or wherever the hell. And there are thousands of them. So what is going to set apart a real studio film from these independents that can kind of make anything? It's going to be spectacle, studio backing, and stars.

[11:59] Andrew DeWolf: And that's what they're throwing.

[12:00] Big Beak: For all that, you have to spend 20 more billion dollars.

[12:03] Jesse McAnally: Exactly. That's why Sundance is basically a joke at this point, because there are no true blue indies that are getting picked up because they can distribute themselves. What do you need a studio for?

[12:12] Andrew DeWolf: So you're saying it's all the union's fault for making it too expensive to pay people?

[12:18] Jesse McAnally: I'm not saying I'm not blaming a union. I'm blaming the fact that no one can trust a smaller film to actually do well. And there is very few stars that the general audiences feel compelled to go see. Like, could we have five different Jim Carrey vehicles that make a shit zillion dollars in one year? I don't think so. The only star that seems to bring people out to the pictures is Zendaya.

[12:47] Big Beak: Oh, no, you're forgetting.

[12:49] Andrew DeWolf: The internet's here for getting one, uh, Dwayne, the rock Johnson.

[12:54] Jesse McAnally: Oh yeah. He's a big star. He's a big name.

[12:56] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah. Look at how great Moana 2026 is doing.

[12:59] Jesse McAnally: I remember when I saw Black Adam and I was like, this changes everything.

[13:03] Andrew DeWolf: The hierarchy of the DC universe changed that day, Andrew.

[13:09] Jesse McAnally: And the thing is, he wasn't wrong.

[13:11] Andrew DeWolf: It did change.

[13:12] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, it disappeared.

[13:15] Andrew DeWolf: Gone in an instant.

[13:19] Jesse McAnally: It's like when the sea people wiped out like Crete and they said the hierarchy of Crete is about to change. Our age of bronze is collapsing.

[13:28] Andrew DeWolf: Did you like the Odyssey?

[13:30] Jesse McAnally: I kind of had that same feeling. I've learned that I'm an Odyssey snob, but I've also learned that I really like my eardrums to not explode. I'm a big fan.

[13:39] Andrew DeWolf: The loudest drums, not ever. My partner had to pull out earplugs.

[13:44] Jesse McAnally: I pulled out earbuds.

[13:46] Andrew DeWolf: My my. Did he get you with the?

[13:48] Jesse McAnally: No, he got me with the Cyclops screaming the.

[13:52] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, OK. So my friend saw it at the AFI Theater and the projectionist came out for a Q&A at the start. And she said, yeah, I've turned down this movie five decibels.

[14:06] Jesse McAnally: It was really like you feel it in your chest level, like there's the scene where they're like at the end where like Troy is being destroyed and you just hear screaming at the level of human beings screaming in a room.

[14:20] Andrew DeWolf: That was fine. It was just the side. That was rough. It was the Cyclops and that bit on the ocean when he was like trying to give me a seizure. Nolan, hire a sound mixer or fire the one you have now.

[14:33] Jesse McAnally: The thing is, like I loved four scenes and more than I've loved any other scenes in movies. But then there's also the rest of the movie.

[14:41] Andrew DeWolf: I loved all the stuff with Tom Holland.

[14:43] Jesse McAnally: Really?

[14:44] Andrew DeWolf: I just like Tom Holland.

[14:46] Jesse McAnally: And then he might be a real movie star.

[14:49] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, I don't know. He's Spider-Man. Tom Holland just strikes me as like a guy more than anybody in that movie. I don't know if that makes sense.

[14:57] Jesse McAnally: It's like if my buddy Brian. It's like this happened to my buddy Brian last week. Kind of kind of vibes from Tom Holland's.

[15:05] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, Brian's back. Brian's the king now. Hell, yeah. I got to go die for Brian now.

[15:11] Jesse McAnally: No, the all the stuff with Matt Damon, I was just like, OK, I think that this is how I also learned that I'm actually a really big Odyssey snob because I walked out of that movie and I'm like, oh, they ruined the stuff with the Cyclops or they ruined Calypso or they ruined. You know, I walked out like disappointed in the spectacle. And that was, you know, that was just what I walked away with.

[15:32] Andrew DeWolf: You're angry they didn't make the movie you wanted to make.

[15:35] Jesse McAnally: I'm angry that, you know, they didn't. I'm disappointed that Nolan is so committed to realism in his film that he's not willing to indulge whimsy even at like one percent.

[15:49] Andrew DeWolf: I haven't seen it. Do they make it so that all the stuff that happens isn't real?

[15:52] Jesse McAnally: Like, no, no. Like she turns them into pigs.

[15:55] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, you know, don't get me wrong. It was disturbing.

[16:00] Jesse McAnally: It was a body horror.

[16:02] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, it was a nice like body horror moment, I guess. Although it lasted like honestly, you could probably cut an hour out of this movie. I think that it was it was an hour longer than it needed to be.

[16:11] Jesse McAnally: The stuff that I liked.

[16:13] Andrew DeWolf: No, but like you just need to cut the scenes shorter. You don't need to cut scenes out.

[16:17] Jesse McAnally: But every scene just went on for like probably 15 minutes longer than it needed to, probably because they shot it on IMAX. So they were like, well, we spent a million dollars per foot of film. So, goddammit, we're going to use every single inch.

[16:30] Andrew DeWolf: What I felt more was like they shot so wide that they couldn't cut around it because it was IMAX.

[16:37] Jesse McAnally: They when you shoot all in wide, you have no coverage to cut to.

[16:41] Andrew DeWolf: Well, no, you like the scene. You just cut the scene, just literally cut the scene shorter.

[16:46] Jesse McAnally: I don't know, man. That was another thing is I didn't see it on IMAX and like Matt Damon's head was bobbing in and out of frame.

[16:54] Andrew DeWolf: You know, you make that point, Big Beak, but maybe if they stretched out a little longer and then put it on Disney Plus.

[17:01] Jesse McAnally: Yeah. Added some songs. Anyway, let's talk about the 1983 video game crash.

[17:06] Andrew DeWolf: All right. You. It's in the fucking desert.

[17:10] Jesse McAnally: The rest of the one or two is in the desert.

[17:12] Andrew DeWolf: The part where the desert a lot of three on in the desert. Moana's part where the Moana dry. Look, it's fucking crazy.

[17:24] Jesse McAnally: All right. They have that woman show up and she sings about how she's going to be free or whatever when the curse is lifted. They lift the curse and she never comes back. Is this where the fuck is she?

[17:33] Andrew DeWolf: This is a good opportunity to tell everybody my theory about how Moana two is actually just Dune. But what I think now is the time to do it. Actually, before we do that, Andrew, give us a quick summary of what happens in Moana two and then she can do this explanation.

[17:48] Andrew DeWolf: OK, so there's like new characters, OK? It's Moana, but they have like she has a little sister now. She's not any older, though. She looks exactly the same, but she now is like a little sister that wasn't she was in the first.

[17:59] Jesse McAnally: She does look a little. I do think that Moana looks a little bit older. They gave her some smile lines.

[18:03] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, she looks haggard. She's she's been out in the sun for a long time. She's got like 30 carcinomas already. She's she's got super cancer. It's fucking over.

[18:15] Jesse McAnally: So, yeah, Moana is exploring the ocean, looking for people because the only people she knows is on that island. She has to find people.

[18:23] Andrew DeWolf: It's not. Yeah, I feel like it's not fully clear why. But she she just she has to. She's looking at an impending genetic bottleneck and she's thinking to herself, I'm probably going to have to marry my cousin if I don't find more people.

[18:38] Jesse McAnally: She has to go find one particular island for some reason.

[18:42] Andrew DeWolf: So, OK, this I'll give context because this also ties into my parallels with Dune. So Moana arrives home to her island after finding a pottery shard that for all she knows could have been left by her people before they moved to their current island. She arrives home. They introduce a bunch of characters through song.

[19:06] Jesse McAnally: Let me see if I can remember their names off the top of my head.

[19:10] Andrew DeWolf: Good luck. God.

[19:12] Jesse McAnally: OK, no, there is an old guy who is a gardener and he's very grumpy. He's got real Harrison Ford grumpy man energy. He doesn't want to sing, even though it's worth a fucking musical.

[19:22] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, there is one of those characters.

[19:24] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, I fucking hate those characters. Like, get out of here. Now, my favorite too many shows with those characters, my favorite character who just says, like, I don't want to sing in this musical despite, you know, getting hired for the musical. And then they've got a really buff guy who's very energetic and he's a big Maui fan.

[19:41] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, that's that's not Maui.

[19:44] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, he's he's he wants to be friends with Maui. He doesn't want to be like Maui. He just wants to be friends with Maui. And I think that's like being friends of Dorothy.

[19:52] Andrew DeWolf: No, I think that's infinitely sadder than wanting like aspiring to, you know, be more like Maui. He just wants to know Maui personally.

[20:02] Jesse McAnally: And then there's a girl who is, I guess, like, I guess, A.S.D. coded. I don't know what they were trying to do with that. But she she's like an engineer.

[20:11] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, she's a shipbuilder. I guess she's a woman in STEM. Excuse you.

[20:15] Jesse McAnally: Is shipbuilding STEM? Is naval architecture STEM?

[20:20] Andrew DeWolf: I kind of don't think so.

[20:21] Jesse McAnally: I think it is.

[20:23] Andrew DeWolf: No, it'd be maybe. Would we even call anything STEM on an island with a village and no college or I think that you need mathematics and engineering to make a fucking canoe?

[20:37] Jesse McAnally: I don't think this girl does math once. I think that she just is hammering and then occasionally it comes together in the shape of a boat.

[20:45] Andrew DeWolf: I think it's important to note that none of these characters do anything.

[20:48] Jesse McAnally: No, they do something.

[20:50] Andrew DeWolf: I got to say, the the old man does the least.

[20:53] Jesse McAnally: He he like literally while watching. I was like, look at him. He wants to die. He's like he's 90 years old. They've dragged him out into this movie. He doesn't even want to be in sense. It doesn't even make sense.

[21:03] Andrew DeWolf: She's like, we need somebody to feed us.

[21:07] Jesse McAnally: OK, yeah, hold on. We'll get to Europe. He's a fucking farmer. What is he going to do? Grow it in the ocean? That's saltwater.

[21:16] Andrew DeWolf: So so Moana comes home. There are girls wearing Moana dresses in celebration of Moana. They have Moana has a cult already forming on the island. Everybody loves Moana. There is no political dissent on her island at all. Nobody is questioning the monarchism.

[21:32] Jesse McAnally: And then her dad hands down. Oh, actually, no, he doesn't hand down the crown to her. He names her Tautai, which I guess translates to king of kings. So he makes her basically the empress of the ocean.

[21:49] Andrew DeWolf: They have a little I. I am seeing the connections like they're forming in my head. And I'm like, oh, shit, he's got something.

[21:57] Jesse McAnally: They have a little ceremony to, you know, to formalize this. He just springs it on her in the middle of the ceremony, by the way. He's like, by the way, I'm making you empress of the oceans. And she's like, oh, OK. And then he's like, here, drink the bones of our ancestors. And then she's about to. And then lightning strikes her.

[22:16] Andrew DeWolf: You might call this divine intervention if, you know, you believed in that.

[22:21] Jesse McAnally: But instead, she is suddenly endowed with all of the memories of her ancestors. And suddenly her ancestor, you know, there's a bit. OK, there's a big whale shark, big glowing whale shark, which I guess is supposed to be God, which regards her with indifference.

[22:39] Andrew DeWolf: It's like a worm.

[22:41] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, my name and where my notes say, wow, real night in the woods moment. And then she suddenly wakes up screaming. I have to find what is the island called? Let's see if it's my notes. It's the underwater island. It's like Mata Nui, but different.

[22:56] Andrew DeWolf: I have to find Eldorado.

[22:59] Jesse McAnally: Yeah. Can we talk about how her island's name is the same island from Bionicle?

[23:05] Andrew DeWolf: Is it really? Wait, what?

[23:07] Jesse McAnally: And Bionicle, they live on an island called Mata Nui.

[23:10] Andrew DeWolf: It's called Manta Fatu.

[23:12] Jesse McAnally: Manta Fatu is the island that they that they have to find. But the her home island is called Mata Nui.

[23:19] Andrew DeWolf: Mata Nui, yes. Which is the island from Bionicle.

[23:24] Jesse McAnally: Did they just look up random Hawaiian words and say, Bionicle, we're from Mata Nui?

[23:29] Andrew DeWolf: They might have. I know the whole lore of Bionicle, too. I read all the books.

[23:33] Jesse McAnally: They moved there from a place called Metru Nui, which was a big city. They had to leave because it got too creepy.

[23:40] Andrew DeWolf: And big, big. I have had a lot of respect for you in the past. Just went down like a half point knowing that about you.

[23:47] Jesse McAnally: Listen, Bionicle kicks ass.

[23:48] Andrew DeWolf: The Bionicle lore.

[23:50] Jesse McAnally: It just reminds me a lot of my brother who was obsessed with Bionicle. And anything reminds me of him.

[23:56] Andrew DeWolf: Dude, he he has the dream every night.

[24:03] Jesse McAnally: I got to be honest with you, folks. Bionicle kicks ass.

[24:06] Andrew DeWolf: Bionicle's great. I think why don't they sell them anymore then?

[24:10] Jesse McAnally: Because it was too good. It's like it's like how they made Instapot. Right. And it was so good a product that everybody bought it and then they didn't need to buy anymore because it was just great and it lasted forever. So then the company went bankrupt because they couldn't sell any because they already sold all the ones that, you know, were ever going to sell.

[24:27] Andrew DeWolf: It's like crystal Pepsi. You make such a good thing and then you take it away.

[24:31] Jesse McAnally: Yeah. OK. Then what happens is a asteroid explodes over the island. Again, if you believe in divine intervention, you know, maybe you're a little bit critical of the chief naming his daughter Empress of the Ocean. Maybe maybe this would be sort of an omen.

[24:47] Andrew DeWolf: But now you're interpreting this wrong. This is all a good sign.

[24:52] Jesse McAnally: Yeah. So they were like, OK, the way to find Montefiato is at we got to follow the comet Montefiato. OK, so she's she's given a vision of your island, which basically is your island's going to die if you can't find Montefiato, because that's where all of the currents of the ocean converge. And you need to go there and lick it so that, you know, it'll break a curse that a deranged lightning God put on it.

[25:20] Andrew DeWolf: And that'll be almost as sleepy about that. Hearing this exposition now as I was in the movie.

[25:25] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, it's not, you know, it's it's a very thin plot. The point of it is, Moana, we literally just like she's got to get there. She's got to get there. And yeah, she can't go it alone, though. Her ancestors might as well have just said, Moana, you need to put together a crew.

[25:38] Andrew DeWolf: Get on a boat right now. So Moana, we need a sequel to your movie. Please go find this island. So she gets her crew. This is the slowest comet in the history of comets, by the way. It's like languishing over the island while she puts all this together over the course of what I can only assume was months. It's the moon. Her first stop is a girl named Toto who says, yeah, let me build you a new boat, to which my first thought was, what the fuck? Don't you have to follow this comet like today? Is the comet just hanging out up there? The second person they go to is Kile, who is a master gardener, the old man who hates musicals. And by that, we don't mean that he smokes a ton of marijuana. He just... I mean, he might. He smokes a ton of marijuana. He would be a lot more useful if he did. I said he was the Harrison Ford-style grumpy old man, so that would track.

[26:33] Jess McAnally: No, Harrison Ford-style has charm.

[26:35] Andrew DeWolf: That's true. What are you talking about? You didn't fall in love with Kile? You didn't look at Kile, and you were like, yes, I care so much about this character. I'm invested in him.

[26:44] Jess McAnally: I said you could cut him easily, and the only reason why they added him is so you wouldn't have sexual tension between the other two.

[26:52] Andrew DeWolf: I'm going to be real. They could cut all three of them. I don't think these characters do shit. There is no reason for any of these characters to exist. I can literally see the meeting of just like, add an old man there so we don't have a love triangle develop between the other three.

[27:05] Jess McAnally: What if we made a love trial go with old man?

[27:12] Andrew DeWolf: She's got an elixir complex. We don't know what happens. We don't know what happened after.

[27:16] Jess McAnally: That's what Bob Iger sounds like.

[27:20] Andrew DeWolf: Michael Eisner putting it together. Moana, you got to put together a crew right now.

[27:25] Jess McAnally: All right. All right. She goes on and Mickey Mouse kicks down the door. Oh, put it in old man. Otherwise, they're all going to be fucking on the boat.

[27:39] Andrew DeWolf: She goes on the fucking ocean with her ragtag crew. She bumps into coconut peep. We didn't mention she's also got a random little sister now too so that they can sell to children.

[27:49] Jess McAnally: Andrew did mention that. I think she's fine. I think what's her little sister's name?

[27:56] Andrew DeWolf: Samia.

[27:57] Jess McAnally: Samia. OK, I think she's cute. I think it's like a fine edition like shows that she has someone that wants her to come home because her parents don't.

[28:05] Andrew DeWolf: Well, her parents wanted to go conquer the world. Her dad has given her the political authority to wage war. Dad's like, go find us more islands. We need a bigger fucking more land. There's a little bit of land, Moana. Bring some people back to the island. I see Mata Nui in my dreams and we need to conquer.

[28:29] Andrew DeWolf: This episode is already like completely off the rails. She goes on the ocean with her ragtag crew. Because Dune is basically supposed to be about the Middle East. And then she runs into coconut people from the first movie.

[28:52] Jess McAnally: Yeah, OK, yeah. The ocean drags her to get eaten by a giant clam. The Kakamora are also trying to get eaten by a giant clam. Then they start worshiping the chicken as a god. And then, I don't know, I kind of lose train of thought. Something happens, but somehow they get eaten by a clam.

[29:09] Andrew DeWolf: It's because it's an entire contained episode where, you know, it's about 20 minutes long and we wrap up everything and we end on a cliffhanger. Yeah, eventually they get eaten by the clam. Their boat gets swallowed, I guess. Is that the end of the boat? Does the boat come back? How does the boat survive this?

[29:26] Jess McAnally: No, they get swallowed. Moana goes down one, the boat with the other people go down another. Yeah, and the other people find Maui, who has been suspended from the ceiling like Thor in Thor Ragnarok.

[29:41] Andrew DeWolf: Yes. It's funny because Taika Waititi was the original writer of Moana, the first Moana.

[29:46] Jess McAnally: Oh, was he the writer? I didn't know he wrote it.

[29:48] Andrew DeWolf: He was the first writer, and then they fired him and brought other people in. So I just kind of think like, hmm. So anyway, I guess they rescue Maui. I don't know how Maui got himself into this situation. I guess just by Maui-ing around. He seems to wind up in, you know, involuntary imprisonment quite frequently.

[30:06] Jess McAnally: Yep. He, like the entire plot of the last one was that he didn't have his hook, and he has his hook taken from him for a good chunk of this. And not really even a big issue.

[30:17] Andrew DeWolf: So he's imprisoned by the Guardian of the Clam, I guess. I don't know what her role is, but this is Jess's next crush.

[30:26] Jess McAnally: I mean, come on. She shows up and I'm like, all right, you got my attention, movie. And then she's not in the movie.

[30:33] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, well, she sings a song, right?

[30:36] Jess McAnally: She sings the song in episode two, which is about how you should get lost. And it feels like a villain song.

[30:45] Andrew DeWolf: I've got one line. It feels like it should be a villain song.

[30:47] Jess McAnally: Well, she starts off really menacing. She says, I thought she was going to be the villain.

[30:51] Andrew DeWolf: It seemed like maybe she had like kidnapped Maui.

[30:53] Jess McAnally: Yeah. Well, she has kidnapped Maui. She is the one imprisoning Maui. And she taunts him as well, saying soon Moana will be here to join you in your imprisonment. And then I guess they just forgot that she was going to be the villain.

[31:05] Andrew DeWolf: And then they have her sing a song. And then Moana is all like, oh, when can you come with us or something? And she's like, oh, when you break the curse, I can leave. And then she never shows up ever again.

[31:16] Jess McAnally: I want to talk about this song real quick, Get Lost. I just have one line written down from it, which is this giant clam gets real old, my dear. I just have to say that's up there with consider the coconut as an all time banger line in a song.

[31:32] Andrew DeWolf: I got to ask, did you expect better from the Bridgerton TikTok musical girls?

[31:38] Jess McAnally: I don't want this to have been wasted time. So this is as good a time as ever to go into a rant about that. Because Big Beak listened to the Bridgerton unauthorized musical.

[31:51] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, I did. And did you like it?

[31:53] Jess McAnally: No, I didn't like it very much. I didn't think that it was very good. I think that it was creative. I think it was clever. I don't think that it was clever enough to want to fight for in court. But, you know, I guess if you're into that sort of thing, I've never seen the court of public opinion turn so quickly, like against independent creators and be on the side of a big corporation. The way that that happened, they flew way too close to the sun and it bit them in the ass.

[32:20] Andrew DeWolf: What did they do?

[32:21] Jess McAnally: From my perspective, all I know about this in terms of context is they made the Bridgerton unauthorized musical. They started selling it. Netflix sort of gave him like a thumbs up like, yeah, sure, whatever. You know, it's all it's this is what do you call it? It's cute. Accessory content that'll help us sell Bridgerton more. Right. You know, this isn't going to detract. This will only add to the value of the property. And then I guess something happened where there was some sort of issue. Maybe Netflix wanted to make a musical. I don't know what happened. But no, what happened was they were like, yeah, you can sell the album and do all this stuff. Just don't do any live performances or sell concert venues like don't perform this live. It'll take away from our live shows that we plan to do with Bridgerton.

[33:02] Andrew DeWolf: OK, so they did do live shows. All right. And then they did a live show. They got a cease and desist that morning and they were like, well, yeah, try and sue us. We're popular. And then they did. And everyone's like, oh, yeah, fuck you. And everyone on Bridgerton, including the writers, the actors, all that turned on these girls.

[33:20] Jess McAnally: Well, I mean, yeah, I would turn on them too if my boss sold me to all they had to do was not do that. And they would have been fine. And now they are legally prohibited for performing those songs ever, which means the only songs anyone ever knows them from, they can never perform.

[33:35] Andrew DeWolf: Well, no, now we know them from such songs as Get Lost, where Moana has to get lost to escape the clam, which doesn't make sense because the woman is very obviously leading her out. She guides her down specific pathways. And when Moana goes the wrong way, she hits her on the head and knocks her back down.

[34:02] Jess McAnally: What is this woman's name? I don't even know.

[34:04] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, she's a great clam lady. It didn't even end up in my notes. That's how insignificant she is.

[34:10] Jess McAnally: A tangy. I took notes on Keeley. I got Keeley's name. I got Toto's name. I didn't get an attendees name. Can I? I know we have the doom, the dune thing that you're doing here. But like this is it's just the first movie.

[34:16] Andrew DeWolf: Well, so this is where this is where it changes, right? Where the first movie at this point, this is the act three dip, right? Where Maui explodes his hook. But then they have to learn together to, you know, they have to learn how to come together as a team.

[34:29] Jess McAnally: This part when they're in the clam is when they go meet they go and meet Tama Toa.

[34:34] Andrew DeWolf: No, I mean, coming up next is the third act up, right? So, they have the third act. And that they're all going to die.

[34:39] Jess McAnally: Yeah.

[34:39] Andrew DeWolf: Instead of instead of having the third act be, you know, they worry about, you know, dying and failure and what that'll mean for them as people and their ancestors. They start worrying about dying and failure and what that'll mean for them and their ancestors.

[34:57] Jess McAnally: Interesting.

[34:58] Andrew DeWolf: And then, you know, instead of having Maui abandon them, Maui just abandons them.

[35:05] Jess McAnally: Oh, you're right. It is the same.

[35:06] Andrew DeWolf: It's not the same at all, Jess. You don't understand. It's very different.

[35:12] Jess McAnally: It's very different.

[35:13] Andrew DeWolf: So, they have to go to Montefiato, which is now guarded by lightning tornadoes, just perpetually. I guess that's just, you know, the god just keeps it up. It was hidden by a jealous god. My only notes here say, okay, well, now we need to kill god. I don't know why. I mean, it's like the same thing as the first one where there's a god. We have to kill god again with the power of friendship, you know.

[35:39] Jess McAnally: So, this is sort of like a JRPG at this point. They've got their party together.

[35:42] Andrew DeWolf: Kind of. Then, they use their individual skill sets to basically outmaneuver it. The way that they get around the storm, because Maui starts fighting the tornadoes, but he can't fight all of them enough to actually pull up the island. And he has to protect them because he doesn't trust that they'll be okay. Like, that's his arc.

[36:02] Jess McAnally: Yeah. Maybe, I guess. And, you know, he's absolutely right. They will die without him. He gets struck by lightning. He loses his powers.

[36:10] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah. That's my interpretation. But, as far as I could tell, there was not even a single line of dialogue mentioning this. It just happens on screen.

[36:18] Jess McAnally: Yeah. Well, that showed up. They showed it.

[36:21] Andrew DeWolf: They didn't tell.

[36:22] Jess McAnally: Is it, though?

[36:22] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, 100%. You just don't get it.

[36:25] Jess McAnally: He never even says anything about it. There's no character moment where Maui is like,

[36:29] Andrew DeWolf: No, we're too busy dealing with a Moana corpse.

[36:33] Jess McAnally: It is very funny. So, they play it off. Their solution is basically, okay, God is too racist against humans to actually stop Maui from pulling up the island, as long as we're doing stuff. So, then God kills Moana because she got too close. And then Moana becomes God.

[36:52] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah. And then, so, Moana, I think Moana does die. Like, she actually dies. Maui is depowered from the lightning. He goes and, like, saves her at the bottom. The ocean, who, at this point, has been a real asshole to them, is like, You know what, Maui? You can sing a little song right now. And I guess that awakens the ancestors who return and then elevate Moana to be a demigod. And that, I guess, also raises the island up. She got some sick ink. Mata Fetu arrives at the surface of the ocean. The storm dissipates. I guess the God can't just do it again. They say he cursed it the first time. I guess he can't curse it twice.

[37:35] Jess McAnally: Well, we killed God.

[37:38] Andrew DeWolf: They didn't kill him, though. They just lifted the curse. He could just put the curse right back. He could only do it one time. It's a one-time curse. He found the curse scroll. It was just a scroll, though. Like, you could only use it one time. Curse me once. Shame on you. Curse me twice. People just, after a climax, people just raise their hands like, Hey, uh, question. Can he not do this again? No, he can't. Any other questions? Uh, yeah. Uh, why did, what happened to him? Is he just, is it just, it's just a one-time curse?

[38:08] Jess McAnally: It's just a one-time curse.

[38:09] Andrew DeWolf: The rainbow is the promise that he'll never die.

[38:12] Jess McAnally: Okay.

[38:14] Andrew DeWolf: He became less racist against humans and came out as gay.

[38:17] Jess McAnally: No, he became even more racist against humans. As we learned from the post-credits scene, he puts together his own Avengers force to Thanos.

[38:27] Andrew DeWolf: Literally the Thanos scene from the end of The Avengers.

[38:29] Jesse McAnally: Was there a post-credits scene on this?

[38:31] Andrew DeWolf: Yes, there is a post-credits scene.

[38:33] Jesse McAnally: There is a post-credits scene.

[38:35] Andrew DeWolf: Jonathan Majors from the...

[38:37] Jesse McAnally: What was it?

[38:39] Andrew DeWolf: Ant-Man and the Wasp.

[38:41] Jesse McAnally: He looks at...

[38:43] Andrew DeWolf: He looks at...

[38:45] Jesse McAnally: He looks at Moana.

[38:47] Andrew DeWolf: You think you're the only demigod out here?

[38:49] Jesse McAnally: We've been putting together a team.

[38:51] Andrew DeWolf: There was an idea.

[38:53] Jesse McAnally: To put together a group of extraordinary individuals.

[38:57] Andrew DeWolf: Jasmine from Aladdin.

[38:59] Jesse McAnally: Tangled Girl.

[39:01] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, so it's Maui.

[39:03] Jesse McAnally: All we've got for our team so far is Maui and Black Adam.

[39:07] Andrew DeWolf: *Laughter.*

[39:09] Jesse McAnally: And Guy from Jumanji.

[39:11] Andrew DeWolf: The hierarchy of the Maui cinematic universe is about to change.

[39:15] Jesse McAnally: We have live-action Maui, animated Maui, and Black Adam.

[39:19] Andrew DeWolf: And then we have that guy from Red Notice.

[39:21] Jesse McAnally: Red Notice?

[39:23] Andrew DeWolf: What was his name?

[39:25] Jesse McAnally: Santa Claus?

[39:27] Andrew DeWolf: No, he wasn't Santa. He was the head elf in Red 1.

[39:29] Jesse McAnally: Oh, good for you. You've watched Red Notice.

[39:31] Andrew DeWolf: No, Red Notice is different than Red 1.

[39:33] Jesse McAnally: Red Notice is the one with Gal Gadot and...

[39:35] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, you're right.

[39:37] Jesse McAnally: The actual guy. Oh, Ryan Reynolds.

[39:39] Andrew DeWolf: And Red 1 is the one with Ryan Reynolds and J.K. Simmons.

[39:41] Jesse McAnally: They replaced Gal Gadot with J.K. Simmons, and I have to say honestly, it makes the movie watchable.

[39:45] Andrew DeWolf: I'll take your word for it, considering I'll never watch it.

[39:47] Jesse McAnally: Christmas is coming up.

[39:49] Andrew DeWolf: We got one more Santa Claus first.

[39:51] Jesse McAnally: It's not a musical.

[39:53] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, it is.

[39:55] Jesse McAnally: Santa Claus 3 is. Oh, fuck.

[39:57] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, he sings quite a bit. I thought we were going to get out of it.

[39:59] Jesse McAnally: *Laughter.*

[40:01] Andrew DeWolf: I do also want to mention before we close the plot.

[40:03] Jesse McAnally: *Laughter.*

[40:05] Andrew DeWolf: Maui raises the island. Moana steps on it and that breaks the curse, which restarts all the currents of the ocean.

[40:09] Jesse McAnally: All of the explorers in the world suddenly converge on this island.

[40:11] Andrew DeWolf: I was waiting for the British to show up and claim it.

[40:13] Jesse McAnally: *Laughter.*

[40:15] Andrew DeWolf: The British and the French show up and they start fighting.

[40:17] Jesse McAnally: They start shooting.

[40:19] Andrew DeWolf: Then Moana brings the entire congregation back to Mata Nui.

[40:21] Jesse McAnally: It's like a thousand boats. She just brings this entire flotilla back to the island.

[40:25] Andrew DeWolf: I'm like, why? Why did they do this?

[40:27] Jesse McAnally: I guess she is going to restart trade.

[40:29] Andrew DeWolf: My only thought was now the war is going to start.

[40:31] Jesse McAnally: Now the conquest of the oceans is going to begin.

[40:33] Andrew DeWolf: How isolationist of you.

[40:35] Jesse McAnally: She's going to turn to Toto and she's going to say, Toto, send them to God.

[40:37] Andrew DeWolf: *Laughter.*

[40:39] Jesse McAnally: She's a demigod too, so she has divine authority to basically conquer the world.

[40:41] Andrew DeWolf: She has divine authority and loyalty to one specific island.

[40:43] Jesse McAnally: What I'm trying to say is Moana 3 should be Dune Messiah. It should be an exact retelling of Dune Messiah, but there's water. Let's make it happen. Denis Villeneuve, hit me up.

[40:47] Andrew DeWolf: We have the post-credits scene.

[40:49] Jesse McAnally: Clearly they want Moana 3.

[40:51] Andrew DeWolf: Denis Villeneuve, hit us up on Blue Sky.

[40:53] Jesse McAnally: Okay, that's the plot of Moana 2.

[40:55] Andrew DeWolf: And it's just the same as Dune.

[40:57] Jesse McAnally: It's exactly the same as Dune.

[40:59] Andrew DeWolf: You could watch Dune instead of this and you would still know the plot of Moana 2.

[41:01] Jesse McAnally: Show Dune to your kids instead of the Moana 2 film.

[41:03] Andrew DeWolf: I think I'm going to do that.

[41:05] Jesse McAnally: I think that's actually a pretty good call there.

[41:07] Andrew DeWolf: Speaking of pretty good calls, let's go into a mid-show.

[41:09] Jesse McAnally: Remember kids, this is The Mind Killer.

[42:41] Jesse McAnally: Where can the innovators at Chevrolet get discounts on their car insurance?

[42:43] Andrew DeWolf: Nice ride.

[42:45] Jesse McAnally: And how do those at Crayola who brighten our lives insure their employees' lives?

[42:47] Andrew DeWolf: They choose MetLife.

[42:51] Jesse McAnally: Everyone should have insurance this good. Take the first step at YouTube.com slash MetLife.

[43:07] Andrew DeWolf: Hey guys, sorry to interrupt you in the middle of the show but we've got to shill it to you. Today's show is brought to you by the extremely kind donations by our donors over at Patreon. Andrew, tell us a little bit about Patreon. What's going on there?

[43:15] Jesse McAnally: Patreon's where you can go if you'd like to support us. And also get some extra content for yourself.

[43:19] Andrew DeWolf: You can also watch our episodes live so you can see Big Beak here who is always entertaining live on camera here. Just making faces and doing dances and things. It's very fun.

[43:25] Jesse McAnally: I think we also have a Patreon-only podcast right now with Jess and Liz if you want to check that out.

[43:29] Andrew DeWolf: Our current patrons are...

[44:07] Jesse McAnally: We already have Carl Baldasso, JRL Studios, Fiberty Jigot, Caleb Bailey, Davin Willis, Sophia Hurtado, Jessica, PantsPants, Casey Denning, and Kiana.

[44:19] Andrew DeWolf: These people give us a little extra financial support that helps us keep the lights on here at Musicals with Cheese. And if you would like to join them in supporting us, getting that podcast Andrew mentioned, video episodes, as well as group hangouts, we're going to be watching, I think, The Princess Diaries pretty quickly on the Discord. Maybe Big Beak will join us for that if he's kind enough.

[44:39] Jesse McAnally: He loves Princess Diaries.

[44:41] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, just send me the right fucking date this time, Jess.

[44:43] Jesse McAnally: Damn!

[44:45] Andrew DeWolf: We went most of the episode without bringing it up.

[44:47] Jesse McAnally: I gotta say, you upped our Jellicle Ball episode by like five points.

[44:51] Andrew DeWolf: With my absolute ass audio.

[44:53] Jesse McAnally: I mean, you came in with that audio.

[44:55] Andrew DeWolf: Our discussion was great of the architecture in what the fuck was that movie called?

[44:57] Jesse McAnally: Megalopolis.

[44:59] Andrew DeWolf: Morbius.

[45:01] Jesse McAnally: For those who want to know Big Beak's actual opinions on the Megalopolis and all that, I put his entire message on our Instagram.

[45:07] Andrew DeWolf: I'm not even joking, it's there.

[45:09] Jesse McAnally: For our Jellicle Ball post, you have the entire announcement. Has that gotten any reactions from anybody?

[45:15] Andrew DeWolf: Does anybody give a shit about the architecture of Megalopolis besides me and Andrew?

[45:19] Jesse McAnally: I do.

[45:21] Andrew DeWolf: Some people care.

[45:23] Jesse McAnally: Let's get back to the show.

[45:25] Andrew DeWolf: I just want that Design Authority jumpsuit.

[45:27] Jesse McAnally: I want all the clothes in that.

[45:29] Andrew DeWolf: The jumpsuits were unironically extremely good.

[45:31] Jesse McAnally: I like the suits with the toga style thing.

[45:33] Andrew DeWolf: I love that. That's fucking awesome. I'd wear that.

[45:37] Jesse McAnally: Megalopolis is the first so good that it's bad movie.

[45:39] Andrew DeWolf: That might actually be true.

[46:29] Jesse McAnally: Just mix up the Chex and the seasoning, shake it in a bag, and pop it in the microwave.

[46:31] Andrew DeWolf: They're not coming?

[46:33] Jesse McAnally: We can't eat the Chex Party Mix?

[46:35] Andrew DeWolf: Alright! Chex Party Mix. It's so easy and so good.

[46:37] Jesse McAnally: The funniest musical in forever has just opened on Broadway.

[46:39] Andrew DeWolf: I know, I'm telling everyone.

[46:41] Jesse McAnally: Time Out gives Mean Girls four stars.

[46:43] Andrew DeWolf: This calls for jazz hands.

[46:45] Jesse McAnally: Janice, do them.

[46:47] Andrew DeWolf: Count me on Team Regina.

[46:49] Jesse McAnally: Duh. Mean Girls tickles the ears, eyes, and funny bone.

[46:51] Andrew DeWolf: Really? He just said so. Don't be thirsty.

[46:53] Jesse McAnally: Thank heavens. Tina Fey has brought the musical comedy back to Broadway.

[46:55] Andrew DeWolf: Wow. This show is a marvel.

[46:57] Jesse McAnally: I forget what we're talking about.

[46:59] Andrew DeWolf: Mean Girls on Broadway. Get tickets now.

[47:21] Andrew DeWolf: Hey guys, it's time for everyone's favorite part of the show, where Andrew and Big Beak have to go head-to-head to guess whether it's a one-star or five-star based on nothing but the review alone. It's time for Previews!

[47:31] Jesse McAnally: It's time for Previews! Previews!

[47:33] Andrew DeWolf: It's time for Previews!

[47:35] Jesse McAnally: Andrew, you ready to go first?

[47:37] Andrew DeWolf: Um, yeah. I think so.

[47:39] Jesse McAnally: Alright.

[47:41] Andrew DeWolf: Sobbed. For what reason?

[47:43] Jesse McAnally: I feel like Sobbed, there's not even a moment where they wanted you to be sad in this.

[47:45] Andrew DeWolf: Sobbed like the car?

[47:47] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, this is a one.

[47:49] Andrew DeWolf: That was a five, Andrew. You were wrong.

[47:51] Jesse McAnally: Motherfucker. Sobbed when?

[47:53] Andrew DeWolf: When they thought that that buff guy died.

[47:55] Jesse McAnally: What the fuck is this shit?

[47:57] Andrew DeWolf: Monty.

[47:59] Jesse McAnally: Monty almost died, Andrew. You don't even care. Everyone's favorite character.

[48:01] Andrew DeWolf: Big Beak, your turn.

[48:03] Jesse McAnally: Oh no, everybody liked him.

[48:05] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[48:07] Jesse McAnally: Alright, Big Beak, it's your turn.

[48:09] Andrew DeWolf: Something like 2001 A Space Odyssey leaves you thinking how?

[48:11] Jesse McAnally: Five stars.

[48:13] Andrew DeWolf: That is a one-star.

[48:15] Jesse McAnally: That's wrong. They did it wrong.

[48:17] Andrew DeWolf: That was incorrect.

[48:19] Jesse McAnally: Andrew, Disney's Megamind 2.

[48:21] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, that's harsh. That's harsh.

[48:23] Jesse McAnally: That's gotta be a one.

[48:25] Andrew DeWolf: That is correct. Have you seen Megamind 2?

[48:27] Jesse McAnally: I haven't seen that. I have not, but I've not heard anything good, and I refuse to taint my opinion of Megamind, because Megamind is fucking phenomenal.

[48:31] Andrew DeWolf: Big Beak.

[48:33] Jesse McAnally: Yeah? Do I need a thumbs up from you?

[48:35] Andrew DeWolf: Three dots.

[48:37] Jesse McAnally: Dot, dot, dot. An ellipsis?

[48:39] Andrew DeWolf: Yes. Five stars.

[48:41] Jesse McAnally: That is a one-star.

[48:43] Andrew DeWolf: Again, these are all wrong. This is a five-star movie, so all of these should be five stars.

[48:47] Jesse McAnally: You make points.

[48:49] Andrew DeWolf: Do you mean five out of ten? Because this is only out of five.

[48:51] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, I mean five out of five. I'm not just saying that because Michael Eisner has my family.

[48:55] Andrew DeWolf: Michael Eisner has no control over Disney.

[48:57] Jesse McAnally: That's what he wants you to think, Jess.

[48:59] Andrew DeWolf: Nearly 20 years.

[49:01] Jesse McAnally: Michael Eisner would have never allowed. Shut your fucking mouth, Jess.

[49:03] Andrew DeWolf: No, Michael!

[49:05] Jesse McAnally: Michael Maus!

[49:07] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah?

[49:09] Jesse McAnally: It just keeps getting better, crying face.

[49:11] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, boy. It just keeps getting...

[49:13] Jesse McAnally: What?

[49:15] Andrew DeWolf: That's... No, one.

[49:17] Jesse McAnally: That was a five.

[49:19] Andrew DeWolf: We're being real? It just keeps getting better? Like, is that... We're for real?

[49:23] Jesse McAnally: I refuse.

[49:25] Andrew DeWolf: I don't believe that.

[49:27] Jesse McAnally: Alright, Big Beak. Last one.

[49:29] Andrew DeWolf: Five.

[49:31] Jesse McAnally: That is correct.

[49:33] Andrew DeWolf: Good job, everyone.

[49:35] Jesse McAnally: That's what I told you. It's a five-star movie.

[49:37] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, Michael. You can let him go now.

[49:39] Jesse McAnally: Do we want to talk about any of these songs?

[49:41] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, I do.

[49:43] Jesse McAnally: Because there's one line in one... Actually, no. There's a few lines in every song that I think are interesting because of how bad they are.

[49:49] Andrew DeWolf: Villagers lost and driving weaving new kites for flying building new homes and families our people just keep expanding let's pull the roof higher I can't wait till I retire the ancestors would be proud what once was lost has been found.

[50:05] Jesse McAnally: We're back to who we're meant to be.

[50:07] Andrew DeWolf: To who we're meant to be.

[50:09] Jesse McAnally: Do you have to sing?

[50:11] Andrew DeWolf: Hey, kids! Gather round if you want to hear about the greatest wayfinder of all time a living legend.

[51:16] Andrew DeWolf: Want to start with We're Back, A Dinosaur Story?

[51:18] Jess McAnally: Yeah.

[51:19] Andrew DeWolf: Roll back the rock to the dawn of time and sing this song with me.

[51:25] Jess McAnally: We're back to where we're meant to be, which I guess is like...

[51:29] Andrew DeWolf: That's a real like revanchist sort of thesis if I've ever heard it.

[51:34] Jess McAnally: It's almost as like nothing as like the next right thing from Frozen 2 where I'm like, what are we saying with this?

[51:39] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, well...

[51:42] Jess McAnally: We're back.

[51:43] Andrew DeWolf: No, she's saying...

[51:44] Jess McAnally: We're doing a sequel.

[51:46] Andrew DeWolf: We're back.

[51:47] Jess McAnally: She's basically saying, all right, now it's time to spread our glory over the entire world.

[51:52] Andrew DeWolf: The whole ocean should be Mata Nui.

[51:55] Jess McAnally: It was promised.

[51:57] Andrew DeWolf: Mata Nui was promised on this land.

[51:59] Jess McAnally: All the islands were promised to us by the demigod Maui himself.

[52:03] Andrew DeWolf: He pulled them from the ocean for us to inhabit.

[52:08] Jess McAnally: Not for anybody else.

[52:09] Andrew DeWolf: Not for the Swahilis we meet at the end of this movie.

[52:12] Jess McAnally: Not for the British who come inevitably in the next movie.

[52:15] Andrew DeWolf: And take them for anyways.

[52:17] Jess McAnally: All I could think about the whole time at that last scene was the Jason Momoa Apple TV series where it's like about the war for Hawaii.

[52:23] Andrew DeWolf: Like the series of Polynesian backstabs and battles and bloody conflicts that arose from the monarchy.

[52:36] Jess McAnally: Yeah, but have you considered this is a Disney film and everyone's going to live happily and no issues are going to happen.

[52:41] Andrew DeWolf: It's just like the end of Pocahontas.

[52:43] Jess McAnally: The British will never find us here, she seems to say.

[52:49] Andrew DeWolf: One of my favorite pieces of IMDb trivia was this ending is very similar to the ending of Hercules where she dies and comes back to life just like Megara.

[52:58] Jess McAnally: That was a real piece of IMDb trivia.

[53:01] Andrew DeWolf: That's not trivia. That's just like an observation.

[53:04] Jess McAnally: Let's add my own trivia about this is just Dune.

[53:12] Andrew DeWolf: Megara's not even the main character of Hercules.

[53:16] Jess McAnally: I think you should do it.

[53:17] Andrew DeWolf: I think you should legitimately add that because no one will stop you.

[53:20] Jess McAnally: Moana is just Paul Atreides.

[53:24] Andrew DeWolf: Moana Atreides.

[53:26] Jess McAnally: Jason Momoa is in Dune.

[53:29] Andrew DeWolf: That's basically Maui, right?

[53:32] Jess McAnally: Can we talk about can I get a chihu?

[53:35] Andrew DeWolf: We're skipping ahead pretty quick.

[53:37] Jess McAnally: That is the last song.

[53:38] Andrew DeWolf: What's the song after we're back?

[53:40] Jess McAnally: It's beyond the follow up to the actual good song from the first movie.

[54:08] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, yeah.

[54:09] Jess McAnally: Oh, yeah.

[54:32] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, it's just kind of like how far I'll go, but light like, you know, like a worse version of how far I'll go.

[54:38] Jess McAnally: She says, I am Moana in it. Imagine this, Jess, you know, you are getting sued. Disney comes to you and they say, Jess, we need you to write songs exactly like Lin-Manuel Miranda because we forgot to hire him for this.

[54:54] Andrew DeWolf: He sued us on Mufasa. That's the reason why they didn't hire him. It was Mufasa and Encanto, I think, were the reasons.

[55:00] Jess McAnally: One of those is a good enough reason. One of those is not.

[55:04] Andrew DeWolf: Bye bye.

[55:05] Jess McAnally: Bye bye.

[55:06] Andrew DeWolf: You know, actually, the songs in Mufasa aren't bad.

[55:10] Jess McAnally: That's going to be my defense.

[55:12] Andrew DeWolf: I'm not going to watch it for him, though.

[55:15] Jess McAnally: I will never know because I'll never watch Mufasa.

[55:18] Andrew DeWolf: I saw it in theaters. Let me tell you, when you get a free ticket every day, you know, you see a lot of movies.

[55:23] Jess McAnally: You'll just go see whatever garbage.

[55:25] Andrew DeWolf: Like I said, it's something to do.

[55:28] Jess McAnally: I hope you enjoyed that time. You're not going to have it very much coming up.

[55:32] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, that is true. I told Jess this. I didn't tell Andrew, but I bought a house.

[55:37] Jess McAnally: I just learned this week that it's actually 2% asbestos by volume.

[55:43] Andrew DeWolf: That's not bad.

[55:44] Jess McAnally: That's only 2%?

[55:45] Andrew DeWolf: Only 2%.

[55:46] Jess McAnally: Asbestos is great.

[55:47] Andrew DeWolf: I usually buy fat-free myself.

[55:52] Jess McAnally: Asbestos is great. It's so great. It never degrades.

[55:55] Andrew DeWolf: That's kind of the problem with it because it gets in your lungs and then it never degrades.

[56:00] Jess McAnally: Andrew, any thoughts on Beyond? What do you think is the best song in the show, I guess?

[56:05] Andrew DeWolf: That's probably the best one. My opinion on every single song in the show that's new is that it's just the worst version of a song that exists.

[56:33] Andrew DeWolf: Take a look around I've had enough split up and down closed on the edge, it's all about living bold and free expand your mind to see and put your trust in me because you've got potential to travel the distance I've been existential and lost to existence and there is no map to your destination no explanation to solve this equation we gotta get lost cut loose and lose our way there ain't no fun in holding back, babe you've found your way the thrill of living dangerously.

[57:20] Andrew DeWolf: You run along the waiting line Get Lost fucks so much, though, in a weird way of being it kind of becomes so bad it's good for me. Get Lost is, I think, the only song that, like, they didn't have Mickey Mouse in the studio holding them hostage and demanding they write a Lin-Manuel Miranda song.

[57:39] Jess McAnally: It doesn't sound, maybe, like, in the heights, maybe, but it doesn't sound much like anything Lin-Manuel Miranda has ever written for Disney.

[57:47] Andrew DeWolf: No, not, even Lin-Manuel Miranda wrote for himself, like, not even the word, this sounds like the Bridgerton girls, like, it sounds like their Bridgerton stuff, and I like that about it. Like, I can almost hear their voice in this song, the way I could hear them trying to do shit British accents in that album.

[58:06] Jess McAnally: Although, you might just be distracted by the lady.

[58:09] Andrew DeWolf: She is, like, she's this evil bat lady with, like, these fangs, and she's, like, calm.

[58:15] Jess McAnally: Yeah, we learned she's not evil.

[58:17] Andrew DeWolf: She did something, I'll tell you, I'll tell you what.

[58:19] Jess McAnally: We learned she's just lazy.

[58:21] Andrew DeWolf: Jess had to pause the movie after this one, too.

[58:23] Jess McAnally: Yeah, for someone else, I had to go. I had to go see what the wife was up to, you know what I mean?

[58:30] Andrew DeWolf: Do you print these characters out and, like, put them on your bedroom wall or something? Do you, like, have, like, a collage?

[58:37] Jess McAnally: Yeah, I've got her and then the wife from the Santa Claus 2. And then your wife just rolls her eyes every time you add a new one to the wall.

[58:46] Andrew DeWolf: The fact that it's only their heads makes it seem like I've got serial killer intentions.

[58:50] Jess McAnally: Their eyes are coming out.

[58:54] Andrew DeWolf: Scratched off the mouth.

[58:57] Jess McAnally: You know, you gotta fit the hole in there, you know?

[59:00] Andrew DeWolf: So, can I get a Chi-Hoo?

[59:02] Jess McAnally: No, isn't there, aren't there, there's one more, right? Where, like, Moana is sad, and then her grandma comes to tell her.

[59:09] Andrew DeWolf: The ancestors arrive and say, hey, listen, you're sad, but, like, go do it.

[59:13] Jess McAnally: No, that was the first movie.

[59:14] Andrew DeWolf: Go, no, no, no.

[59:15] Jess McAnally: No, that was the first movie.

[59:17] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, no, you're right, you're right.

[59:19] Jess McAnally: Yeah, in the first movie, she's sad and her grandma comes to console her. In this movie, she's sad and then her grandma comes to console her, I think.

[59:26] Andrew DeWolf: It's just Beyond again.

[59:27] Jess McAnally: It's just the Beyond reprise.

[59:29] Andrew DeWolf: And it doesn't work as well as the How Far I'll Go reprise.

[59:32] Jess McAnally: Yeah, well, because How Far I'll Go is basically, like, I've got to right a wrong, or I've got to become who I am. This is a movie about Moana becoming God.

[59:40] Andrew DeWolf: That just doesn't sit right with me.

[59:44] Jess McAnally: It's a coming-of-God movie.

[59:48] Andrew DeWolf: In this movie, Moana becomes God, and, like, I don't know if that's really the message that we should be sending.

[59:54] Jess McAnally: Moana 2, she killed God, and now killed and became God. Moana 3 has a moral obligation now to be Dune Messiah.

[1:00:03] Andrew DeWolf: Like, they have to do it now, or they have just made the worst trilogy ever.

[1:00:07] Jess McAnally: That, or it could become God of War.

[1:00:09] Andrew DeWolf: God of War, where she's, like, punished.

[1:00:12] Jess McAnally: She's forced to wear the ashes of her ancestors forever.

[1:00:16] Andrew DeWolf: She's got her little sister, Samia, and she's just, like, walking through the straits of just, like, you don't know what I've done, girl.

[1:00:25] Jess McAnally: Girl, you don't know the sins I've committed. Come, girl.

[1:00:30] Andrew DeWolf: You don't know how many gods I've killed.

[1:00:33] Jess McAnally: She carries Maui's head like a fucking chain.

[1:00:38] Andrew DeWolf: It's on her oar, the other end of her oar is Maui's head, and he talks to her and gives her advice.

[1:00:43] Jess McAnally: Or, no, Maui's tattoo lives on the paddle.

[1:00:45] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, shit, Maui's tattoo, yeah, yeah.

[1:00:48] Jess McAnally: Damn, guys.

[1:00:50] Andrew DeWolf: No, she just sewed it right onto her own skin.

[1:00:53] Jess McAnally: You know, Maui's a real figure, right? So we could make Maui the unauthorized musical and put a...

[1:00:59] Andrew DeWolf: Yes, and we just rip off these songs.

[1:01:04] Jess McAnally: And then they sue us, and we say, up to that.

[1:01:06] Andrew DeWolf: And then we perform it live, and everyone hates it.

[1:01:10] Jess McAnally: And nobody shows up, because these songs aren't good.

[1:01:14] Andrew DeWolf: So, anyway, yeah, can I get a Chi-Hoo?

[1:01:17] Jess McAnally: Can I get a Chi-Hoo?

[1:01:21] Andrew DeWolf: Here's the deal, that bullying storm gods could play big for real. Can you imagine the legend this epic voyage reveals? You'd think that it's doomsday, to me it's just Tuesday.

[1:01:31] Jess McAnally: You know what, I'll come to play, come to play. And you're clever, I never give you enough credit. And under pressure you measure up, you even taught me a lesson.

[1:01:39] Andrew DeWolf: I'm not surprised, you learn from the best. Takes a whole lot, but count me impressed. Can't give up now, you got me invested. How many hoomans that I call the best?

[1:01:46] Jess McAnally: Hey, Chi-Hoo!

[1:01:49] Andrew DeWolf: Who are you, who are you, who are you gonna be? You're gonna, you're gonna make some history. Come on, Moana, go get your destiny.

[1:01:58] Jess McAnally: Can I get a, can I get a Chi-Hoo?

[1:02:01] Andrew DeWolf: It's my turn to give a motivational speech. It's your job to finally practice what you preach.

[1:02:07] Jess McAnally: Because of you, I'm a better me. I didn't even think that was a possibility.

[1:02:12] Andrew DeWolf: You got me out of mess after mess. Got me kind of distressed, but now the rules are reversed. You're being put to the test.

[1:02:18] Jess McAnally: It's fine, cause we got a plan for breaking the curse. And even the odds couldn't be worse.

[1:02:22] Andrew DeWolf: I'm making the bed on the bravest and greatest... I'm gonna read to you fine folks, uh, can I get a Chi-Hoo real quick? Because, um, let me tell ya.

[1:02:29] Jess McAnally: Sorry.

[1:02:35] Andrew DeWolf: Wayne the Rock Johnson, the best movie star of all time. So, so Chi-Hoo has this one line.

[1:02:39] Jess McAnally: I looked up the lyrics on Genius.

[1:02:43] Andrew DeWolf: And, uh, the only note for this song was, uh, it's just Tuesday.

[1:02:51] Jess McAnally: And the note on, the Genius annotation says, this is lying, it's specifically a reference to 1994's Street Fighter.

[1:03:00] Andrew DeWolf: It's true.

[1:03:02] Jess McAnally: It's not even a lie. Reference from where the villain M. Bison tells Chun-Li, on a lifelong quest to seek revenge for the death of her father, that he doesn't even remember the incident. For you, the day Bison graced your village was the most important day of your life, but for Maui it was a Tuesday.

[1:03:20] Andrew DeWolf: And we're getting a new Street Fighter movie this, uh, this year. And isn't, like, what's his name? Uh, fuckin' dude, polka dot man, David Dismalchian. Isn't he playing M. Bison?

[1:03:31] Jess McAnally: I think so.

[1:03:32] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, he'd do fine. He's no Raul Julia, though.

[1:03:35] Jess McAnally: So then, this song is basically, like, Maui hyping up Moana after she almost gets Monty killed.

[1:03:42] Andrew DeWolf: The thing is, I could kinda hum this one. It does become, like, a theme. Like, what a, what you wanna be!

[1:03:49] Jess McAnally: So this was the, um, this was the reason that I looked it up. Because the lyrics are so ass.

[1:03:55] Andrew DeWolf: I'm just gonna...

[1:03:57] Jess McAnally: The lyrics are so ass!

[1:04:05] Big Beak Entertainment: I make some history, come on Moana, go get your destiny, can I get a can I get a can I get a Chihu, you got a yuan, you want to you need to level up. Go show them. Go show them. Tell them enough's enough. Come on Moana, go get your destiny. Come more. So. Hey, don't do you leave? No, I'm not making that joke. So I made note of this one. Maui has nipples both in this one and the previous one and live action Moana. He does not have nipples anymore. I put him in a bodysuit. Wait, why did Dwayne The Rock Johnson need a bodysuit? I guess he is like sixty five now. He lost a lot of weight to be in like the whatever fucking movie. Yeah, Smashing Machine, right? Yeah. Yeah. Wait, that's kind of unsettling.

He doesn't have nipples. He just doesn't have nipple. They didn't draw nipples onto the costume like really. It's once you see it. Hold on. Let me actually share this image. It's kind of distracting like that. He once you kind of make note of it like, oh my God, what the fuck? Ah. No, you can't do that. He's supposed to have nipples, dude. Human beings have nipples. No, he's got. OK, he's got nipples. I can see like a little nub, I think, under that under that ink. You might be seeing things. No, there's nothing there. I think he's got a nipple there. I think that's what that is. On the right side, I can kind of see it. But on the left side, I've got nothing. The fact is we are debating whether or not we see a nipple.

I don't think that's a I don't think that's a body suit, is it? There's no way they put him in a. No, it's a body suit. Oh, my God. I thought that was his body and they put his they put his face on on the CGI creation. Like, here is what he looked like on the set. And that's a body suit. Oh, yeah, that is. Like, why is Green the Rock Johnson so desperate for attention? I don't understand. He's just a working actor. Rich enough. I don't get the sense that he's desperate for attention. I get the sense that he's like, I just kept taking roles and it kept working, you know, like. But like every time he does something, though, he's like, I hear that he begged for Moana to get remade so that he could play.

He that is a rumor. Disney asked him to do it. OK, OK. I would I would believe so has done the thing like with the fucking Black Adam where he's that one hierarchy is changing. That one is like, yeah, that one's definitely trying to put himself front and center of like everything. I don't know. I guess there was also whatever drama he had. He can't lose fights. There was whatever drama he had with like Vin Diesel. I don't know what that was about. I just feel like those are two men that I wouldn't want to talk to, you know, too bad. I really would want to be in the same room as I talked to Vin Diesel about his time playing Groot. I said, I am Groot. And then I said, very interesting. What else did you say? It was about family, man. Family, family. You mean like family guy? This is worse than I brought up the time I brought up family guy to Vin Diesel.

[1:07:25] Jesse McAnally: So what is our overall thoughts on Moana 2 and our cheese ratings? Andrew, why don't you start us off?

[1:07:34] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, man. Yeah. So Moana 2 was bad. There was basically no redeeming qualities as far as I am concerned. I really just don't think it was good at all. Yeah. I'm going to give it mainland cheese from New Zealand because I don't know. It's an Oceania. I know New Zealand's like totally different thing, but whatever it cares. Great. Ten points. Bigbeak, you're up next.

[1:08:05] Big Beak Entertainment: Yeah. Moana 2 is not good. I don't enjoy watching it. As they say in the movie, there's really only failing, then learning, then death. That's Moana 2. I'm excited for Moana 3 where she becomes a big worm. I think they have to do that. I think there's a moral imperative to do it. Bob Iger, give us a call. Michael Eisner, call us. Mickey Mouse, call us. Bridgerton Girls, call us. Josh DiMauro, whoever they do is. Bridgerton Girls. I don't think they're ever going to work again. I hate to say it like that. When people were criticizing that nobody liked their songs, one of them was just like, well, let the children decide. What songs will they be singing in three months? Not yours. I also want to bring up their Spotify description that was very obviously written by them.

When two forces of nature unite, magic happens. Dot, dot, dot. That's what is created when Abigail Barlow and Emily Bear, two impressive women in their own rights, joined together to create music history. As shown in the viral success of their original songs for Bridgerton the musical, they used their prolific gifts and multiple music styles to create earworm contagious melodies with broad appeal. Again, they've commented incorrectly. The grammar in this is atrocious. But they broke the glass ceiling on the standard way that a Broadway show is brought to life by involving the audience at every step of the way throughout the creation of the musical via social media and TikTok live. The music of Barlow and Bear is singable, hummable, trendy, and somehow familiar.

They mix today's sound with tributes to the great musicals using elements from pop, classical, and jazz worlds that they came from. Creating a new space in a predominantly male industry, they share their joyful passion to bring musical theatre to the mainstream. Barlow and Bear break down musical stereotypes, creating a fun, fresh sound for the future. You know what? At least AI didn't write it. That screams millennial all over it. I can tell you AI didn't write it because they got the spaces incorrect, and they put commas where they shouldn't have. And there's no M-dash. I know the Gen Z, but they're like real... See, I love the M-dash. I use the M-dash so much. I know, now I can't use it anymore.

Ruins everything. I'm still using it. I like semicolons. I'm glad AI doesn't steal semicolons. I am a big fan of the semicolon. Anyway, my cheese rating for Moana 2 is the cheese that Odysseus finds in the Cyclops cave in the Odyssey. He just eats it without even concern, like, hey look, cheese! Why would you not ask first? It's so impolite. The whole point of the movie is how you can basically just rock up and steal whoever's shit you want because God said it was okay. It's Zeus's law. Zeus's law, you could just... That cheese was promised to them 2,000 years ago. Cheese was promised to Odysseus. The horse was promised to Troy. The horse came to me in a dream. I was given the horse in a dream.

Unironically, that is kind of what happened. I did not like Moana 2. Because you loved it. I had so much hope for Barlow and Bear. I was so even-handed with our coverage of it. I really was like, you know what? Young people should make things, and it's cool that they won a Grammy for this. Maybe it's not my thing, but maybe they'll do something good, and then they didn't. Immediately, they made the worst thing you've ever listened to in your life, and it was over. I think it's the worst thing I've ever listened to, but it's certainly not good. I think that they can come back from this if they have the sort of plucky, die-hard, stick-to-itiveness that two forces of nature... Guys, here's how Barlow and Bear can still have a career.

I threw my chicken nuggets against the wall. How could this be happening to Moana 2? I thought the polling was better in Idaho. My cheese rating is the cheese flatbread sold at Disney's Polynesian Village Resort for $12.29.

[1:12:35] Jesse McAnally: Big Beak, as always, you are a joy to have on. I hope we can squeeze in as many guest spots as we can with you in these changing times for you. Please promote your content for where people can find you.

[1:12:46] Big Beak Entertainment: Hello, I'm Big Beak Entertainment. I make YouTube videos sometimes. You can find me at youtube.com slash at Big Beak Entertainment. Come follow me on Blue Sky at Big Beak on Blue Sky. I think that's all it is. I don't know. He's on the Instagrams. Thank God for Blue Sky for being so terrible that it broke my social media addiction. Follow me on Patreon, the only place where I'm actually posting consistently if you want to do that. Occasionally, one gets out for free. I can't help it. Sometimes something just slips out there. Sometimes you get the Halloween Town 2 Calabar's Revenge video for free. Sometimes it just happens. Thanks for having me back on the show to talk about Moana 2. Have me on next time to talk about, I don't know, a video game musical.

[1:13:40] Jesse McAnally: The Santa Claus 3. Excuse you. We know how this is going.

[1:13:44] Big Beak Entertainment: You know, I mentioned Night in the Woods earlier. You guys should check out Night in the Woods. That's like the closest thing to a musical video game that I think I've ever played.

[1:13:51] Jesse McAnally: You haven't played Stray Gods?

[1:13:53] Big Beak Entertainment: No, I haven't played Stray Gods.

[1:13:54] Jesse McAnally: That's one that everyone keeps saying. You got to play this and it has like all these theater people involved.

[1:13:58] Big Beak Entertainment: Oh, and you'll appreciate this, Jess. Night in the Woods is about industrial decline. So you'll really identify with that as a Michigander.

[1:14:06] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, he lives in Detroit. He's like, that's it.

[1:14:09] Big Beak Entertainment: Yeah, he's the mayor of the airport, right?

[1:14:12] Jesse McAnally: Yes, I am the mayor of the airport.

[1:14:16] Big Beak Entertainment: I also want to recommend Big Beat's most recent video. And I've watched it like 50 times. It's got 62,000 views. I'm sure 50 of them are me.

[1:14:24] Jesse McAnally: Is the You Made a Bad Yakuza Game, Charlie Brown, Peanuts Like a Beagle. It was a great, great thing. Do more like that. I loved it.

[1:14:31] Big Beak Entertainment: Oh yeah. All the Peanuts videos are now getting copyright claims. So I get to spend the next five years fighting those off.

[1:14:37] Jesse McAnally: Oh, I'm sorry.

[1:14:38] Big Beak Entertainment: That's just happened like in the last week, too. It all just started. I don't know what happened, but I got like 20 claims.

[1:14:44] Jesse McAnally: Is it because they sold to whoever they sold to?

[1:14:46] Big Beak Entertainment: You know, well, they sold to Sony, but I'm getting claims from Paramount. It's not anything new. Sony's been chill. It's just Paramount.

[1:14:54] Jesse McAnally: The Nazis. The Nazis are coming for you.

[1:14:57] Big Beak Entertainment: All right, we will see you next time.

[1:14:58] Jesse McAnally: Larry Ellison is breathing down my neck. Larry Ellison is my family.

[1:15:03] Big Beak Entertainment: Michael Eisner took a break and now it's Larry Ellison.

[1:15:07] Jesse McAnally: Michael Eisner, I need you to go save my family.

[1:15:10] Big Beak Entertainment: There was an idea to put together a group of extraordinary individuals.

[1:15:14] Jesse McAnally: Michael Eisner, Bob.

[1:15:15] Big Beak Entertainment: Oh, I'm Michael Eisner.

[1:15:18] Jesse McAnally: Bob Shapek.

[1:15:21] Big Beak Entertainment: Josh DeMarco.

[1:15:22] Jesse McAnally: Roy Disney.

[1:15:24] Big Beak Entertainment: Not Walt.

[1:15:25] Jesse McAnally: Roy E. Disney.

[1:15:26] Big Beak Entertainment: Just Roy.

[1:15:27] Jesse McAnally: Well, which Roy? Are we talking about Roy, the brother or Roy, the idiot nephew?

[1:15:31] Big Beak Entertainment: I would assume the brother. I don't think I'd want to recruit the nephew, although I guess I would get what I get.

[1:15:36] Jesse McAnally: Well, the nephew also is the one that ousted Michael Eisner and the previous CEO. He was really crafty. I think Roy E. Disney is like secretly one of the most important figures in Disney history, but who cares about that?

[1:15:48] Big Beak Entertainment: Roy E. Disney is going to be the Hulk that we like have to track down to the hut in the middle of like Guatemala.

[1:15:55] Jesse McAnally: Yes, I love it. We will see you next time on Musicals with Cheese. Goodbye, folks.

[1:16:00] Jesse McAnally: The Musicals with Cheese podcast is hosted by Jesse McAnally and Andrew DeWolf. Our executive producer is Jesse McAnally and our creative producer is Elizabeth Esten. This show is mixed and edited by Jesse McAnally. Our theme song was composed by Andrew DeWolf and the artwork was designed by JRL Studios. Our Keeper of the Cheese is the one and only Juliet Antonio. If you have the funds available, we would love to have you over at Patreon, where you can get tons of fun perks, including full bonus episodes. Also, if you don't mind, could you leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or a comment on Spotify? Just a few extra words to let us know how we're doing. And if you have any corrections, ideas, or just want to say hello, send us an email at musicaltheaterlives at gmail.com. To listen to our entire backlog of episodes, please visit bpn.fm slash cheese. Thank you so much for listening, and we'll see you next week.